Thursday, 30 December 2010

Explaining To My Youngest Daughter

24th September 2009

How do you explain to a five year old that your breast is being hacked off?  Blunt way of describing what I’m having done, but it is true.  
Well for weeks I have been saying that my breast is poorly so go careful. I am preparing her in some sort of way so it is easier to explain. After all Sophia is not stupid she knows mummy is not well.
Her curiosity to look at the scar under my arm while dressing is amusing.
“Mummy what’s that?” She inspects the area closely and twists her face.
“Does it hurt mummy? It will be better soon.” she kisses me on my cheek.
Swopping scars with a five year old adds laughter to a delicate conversation.
“Mummy, look at my knee? It’s better now.” Sophia points to my armpit.“Is yours better now mummy?”
I sit next to her and say, “Mummies booby is really poorly.” She lifts my vest top up and inspects my breast. “Mummy has to have a new booby made.”
She turns to me, and says “A new booby.” She twists her face and her eyes light up.
“Yes and I won’t have a nipple they need to make me a new one.”
“No nipple!” She shouts.
“They need to tattoo a new one on.”
“A tattoo!” she laughs loudly. Then she vanishes into her bedroom and returns. “A tattoo Mummy?”
“Yes Sophia a tattoo.” I say calmly.
“Ok!” She giggles. “Can you read me my book now?”
Well it broke the ice and I’ve always been open to my girls. She took it well, but she still does not understand, not really. When she sees me after the operation she will still have lots of questions, but at least I am preparing her for the time I spend in hospital. I just hope the plastic surgeon does a good job.
I receive a phone call from the breast care nurse to return to the breast clinic on the 30th September.

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