No matter who you speak to in the land of BC the two words that stand out are ‘New Normal’, but my quest is not new normal. I am in search of routine rather than ‘New normal’. When I received my diagnosis for diabetes the words used were ‘Life changes.’ If I was to reach a ripe old age with my limbs and eye sight intact I must make life changes. So the words ‘Life changes’ seem more appropriate for me. New normal feels you have to turn yourself inside out, but it’s really about routine in all sense of the word. You are in search of a routine with acceptance of a condition you’re not in control of. The fact the next appointment could be ‘Oh dear Mrs Mendoza looks like the big C is back’ does not help. Yes this is a negative sentence, but it is the truth. We live in fear of those dreaded appointments.
Diabetes is no different to cancer it is your cells on a suicidal mission. The fact that the two are now linked which really is no surprise. Means my so called new normal brings another new routine.
Living in London I tend to look for nooks and crannies to observe. It’s an occupational hazard of being a nosey twat as my friends would say. I am not one for being around crowds of people, but in this city you cannot avoid them. It’s like watching scurrying ants all on individual missions with a goal that is just out of reach. They have zero manners and a blind spot that covers the entire line of sight. So when I hear someone say good morning and smile I jump. Straight away you know he is not a Londoner. I make a joke and say, ‘Well I know you’re not from around these parts’. ‘Here’, he said ‘Wow a fellow Yorkshire person with a smile’. I said,’ Too bloody right but shh! We are infiltrating the enemy lines’. Now this whole paragraph is nothing to do with BC, but that is the new routine or new normal. On my blog I talk about BC. In my everyday life off my blog board I am the same old nosey twat that I ever was.
I am not one for sitting at a table with a cup of tea pouring my heart out. You will not get any sense out of me. As my friends say I am good at bullshitting my way through a situation if uncomfortable.
Instead I spew my life out on a blog board in hope my friends develop a better understanding of BC and its effects on me. It gives me a chance to sit back and read with the option to edit what I have written and understand this journey I am on. Talk is cheap, Talk is therapeutic, Talk is understanding that your life is not stood still, but you are whilst others run by if you allow it. New normal! Phewy! I am far from new.... I am ancient with an attitude.
So I have built myself a positivity brain with five things that are important to me.