Monday, 19 November 2012

My Body, My Voice And 100% My Damn Choice!


Last week I read a posting on my FB page from Nancy Point’s blog. The posting was all about the decision of wearing or covering our heads or not during chemotherapy treatment.
I respect why other women feel the need to go down the route of wearing wigs, but people should also respect that some of us are not interested in wigs. Personally I just don’t feel wearing a wig will help me in any way. In fact I know the wig would end up in the bin. Just like the mastectomy bra's and swimming costumes that I found old fashioned in design.
This particular conversation I have noticed keeps cropping up. And some people I know feel by leaving my head bare I am drawing attention to something that should remain private. That the pity me badge was firmly fixed to my chest and it makes people uncomfortable, but what about my comfort? And there reply, but it means no-one knows you have cancer. Apparently by leaving my head bare people will gawp and whisper, but that just proves what sad lives they lead if they even have time to talk nonsense... 

Is the embarrassment so hard to bare?

The breast cancer lottery is not just about cancer, but how those receiving treatment for cancer look for reassurance or acceptance within their peer groups. We are vulnerable already, so the slightest comment of disapproval can lead to a door firmly slammed shut.  

If I was bald with tattoos and a nose piecing no-one would give a rat’s arse, but because I am seen as a so called “NORMAL” individual I should behave accordingly to the image they would like to be in contact with. Yes I cover my head when approaching Sophia’s school because I do not want her to be bullied, but I personally feel I am being bullied.

For crying out loud it is my body, my life, my choice on how I deal with the side effects of chemotherapy. I find my journey and how others “THINK” I should deal with this temporary side effect quite selfish. The pressure applied to fit into a specific jigsaw when I know I don’t fit is tremendous, but I will not be swayed. In other words you know where the door is…..

My bald head is not important to me getting past the treatment is. People should stop looking at the side effects of the treatment as something to blush and feel shame about, but more being apart of my damn survival. 
The hair loss is temporary, the scars I carry are not. It is all about choice not pity to why I do what I do. I personally do not hide the reality of cancer because why should I? It is there and I don’t have an issue with it.

My body, my voice and 100% my damn choice.

To me by pressuring a person into believing covering is the best option is a pathetic excuse due to society’s visual pressures of acceptance. I was always a defiant rebel who chose the easy route when it came to appearance. Facing the mirror each morning struggling and tormenting myself with a mop of fake hair is not important to me. When receiving treatment for cancer I should not feel pressure or shame, but support on this very rigorous journey. We live in a democracy and we should respect personal choices and stop bullying!

Now on to my 4th cycle of chemo… without hair!

4 comments:

  1. Ooh you are feisty! And I love it. A journalist contacted me during the week to ask me for a quote on how important it was for women to be able to afford to wear wigs during chemo, I told her I couldn't comment, because it is an individual choice, and while for some, wearing wigs during chemo is important, for others like me, it is not an issue. She seemed surprised at my answer...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think this chemo is having a lose tongue affect lol .. xxx

      Delete
  2. I could never wear my wig, it looked so fake, exactly like me wearing...a wig! But, since I lost my hair in Dec 2010, and we had an unusually snowy and cold winter, I wore hats all the time to keep from freezing. Even when my hair came back ultra-short after having long hair for so long, some people (that I do not see so often) did not seem to notice my hair style change. Weird.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did it in stages CC as in long, short then bald.. but the cold is an issue i don't deny that.. after having long hair for so long it is strange to get out of bed and not use a hair brush.. won't be long and it will be back and i'll be cussing once again when i can't find the hair brush ;~)

      xxx

      Delete